My roommate and I were cleaning the bathroom.
“Wait,” said my roommate. “I have the perfect tool for this.”
He left, and returned moments later holding my toothbrush.
“Um,” I said calmly, “that’s my toothbrush.”
“No, it’s not,” he replied.
Like I wouldn’t know?
“This is the toothbrush,” he continued, “that I went around and asked everyone about. No one claimed it.”
“I don’t think so,” I said. “Because if that were true, I would have said ‘That’s my toothbrush.’ ”
He considered this.
“Oh,” he finally said. “Then it must have been another toothbrush.”
…
I threw that toothbrush away.