My roommate and I were cleaning the bathroom. “Wait,” said my roommate. “I have the perfect tool for this.” He left, and returned moments later holding my toothbrush. “Um,” I said calmly, “that’s my toothbrush.” “No, it’s not,” he replied. Like I wouldn’t know? “This is the toothbrush,” he continued, “that I went around and asked everyone about. No one claimed it.” […]
A merchant hurrying to market came upon a traveler picking up trash along the roadside. “Why are you picking up trash?” asked the merchant. “It’s not your job.” “Oh, my apologies,” replied the traveler, looking concerned. “Is it your job?” “No, of course not,” said the merchant. “Is it someone else’s job?” asked the traveler. […]
A brief story from 2008: I was sitting in Union Square, idly eating lunch with a group of about six other people, when a young man suddenly approached me. “Excuse me,” he said. “Are you Jewish?” “No,” I replied, truthfully. “Oh,” he said, disappointed but not disheartened; he had a plan for just such a […]
This is a story about the peculiar magnetic properties of a man knitting on the subway in New York City. I wrote this in 2007, shortly after it happened. After visiting my parents in Virginia over Christmas, I took a Greyhound back to New York. As soon as I got off the bus in the city, […]
I worked a late event tonight, and ended up leaving campus at about 9:45. I had eaten an early dinner, so I was already starting to fantasize about my bedtime bowl of cereal as I started the drive home. We were just getting to the good part when I was struck by a terrible realization: I […]
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